Remember those pictures of pastoral beauty with farms dotting the countryside in every Ideals? Small (by today’s standards) silos proudly watch over the farmstead. Trees mark yards and creeks.

Roads with miniscule tractors and pickups forever driving on them…

All the crops are growing…

Rivers wind through the countryside….

Farmyards are mowed and trimmed…

The swing set and sandbox just waiting for littles to come play…

I remember poring over those pictures. I wondered who lived in the houses and if they had a little girl I could play with. Sometimes the little girl was pictured, and what a thing of beauty she was! Big fat curls, round rosy cheeks, sky blue eyes and a dress that was all ruffles and lace with frilly socks to match.

As I got older, those pictures gave me a distinct feeling of nostalgia, as if life was now complicated and tangled and life then was all sunny days and frilly dresses. In those pictures families never had disagreements, crops never failed and mothers
always knew what to cook for supper.

Gazing out over the countryside from the top of a small hill just up from our house, I saw the exact same view as the Ideals pictures of 1980! I stood in awe as I gazed first one way and then the other. I saw the same fields and farms, the same trees, the same roads with miniscule vehicles. In my mind’s eye, I could even see the same
angelic little girl. It was so beautiful and pastoral. The only difference was that I knew the people that lived in most of the places I could see. I knew some of the struggles they had been through. I knew life hadn’t always been easy. I knew of some of the struggles with family relationships and how sometimes crops had failed and
the moms didn’t know what to cook every evening.

I have looked out at that view many times since the first time I noticed it. Every time I do, a lonesomeness for simpler times and fewer tangled strands comes over me. Can’t we just go back to 1980 and live there? How do we come to terms with where we are living now and the desire for a simple lifestyle? How do I raise my girls with the same uncomplicated childhood I was raised with?

They say pictures don’t lie, but they can portray something that may not be true. On the one hand, I’m a little mad that my bubble of “life was simple then; hard now” concept had burst. I WANT to have an excuse for not being able to do things the way I think they should be done. On the other hand, when I saw that view in a whole
new light, I realized a few things about life. The farms in Ideals were only pictures. Pictures that didn’t say anything about the people and their lives. Those images were only the outside beauty of that particular summer day. I realized the rhythm of those lives were much like mine. Husbands didn’t always take out the trash,
children (even beautiful ones) didn’t always obey, and sometimes the Sunday dinner roast was embarrassingly tough.

{We can all live the ideal life}

And yet…..

I look out at my two girls dressed in their Sunday best (on Monday morning because they are playing church). They are walking with their umbrellas and look absolutely angelic as they stroll down the lane. In a picture, they are just as beautiful as Little Miss.

I think about the walk I take (without WhatsApp), the wind rustling the leaves, the breeze making ripples on the lake and the mama pheasant hunkered down in the tall grass. The walk takes me through dappled sunlight on dirt paths with wild roses and an almost unreal blue sky. The prairie grasses are bending and flowing in the summer breeze. Sunsets are worth stopping supper preparations for. In a picture, all is beautiful and perfect, the Ideal summer day.

My husband works hard and makes a good living honestly. He always has a word to say to everyone he meets. Many times we go past places and he can tell me who lives there and something interesting about their lives. He enjoys ‘shooting the breeze’ with anyone and everyone. He can remodel his own shower and fix just about
anything in the house. In a picture, he is the Ideal husband.

He also takes time to do fun things. The girls get almost daily four wheeler rides. He take them fishing and lets them climb the scaffolding and carries them when the hike up Harney Peak gets too much. In a picture, he is the Ideal dad.

We have simple food. My girls hair is combed (mostly) in two braids. We have old fashioned flowers like hollyhocks and zinnias. My girls help with the dishes. We all play with the kitties. We read Thornton W. Burgess and Bible stories. I don’t follow politics because they make me unhappy. I refuse to say I am crazy busy. In a
picture, we have the Ideal life.

I think about our church with its tall steeple and the open beam wooden ceiling. We hear old time singing and the gospel story that has been preached for years. We have potlucks and Bible school and disagreements that we get over. In a picture, it is the Ideal church.

I learned…
The Ideal life isn’t only for the 1980s. It is a mindset that I can adopt right now. I can choose to live simply with the options in my own home and life. Most of all I have changed my mind. For years I have despaired, thinking there was no way to have the life I saw in those images. Those Ideals pictures had actually ruined my perception
of what life should be like. I thought it was all sunny days and green fields with no disagreements. I know better now. I carry that life in my heart and spirit. I don’t need to be taken up with politics and the busyness of today’s
modern women. I have the possibility of the Ideal life right in my heart. It was there all along, I just needed to find it.

What makes your life ideal?