I’ve gotten the mail, checked the weather, made a cup of tea, lit some candles, visited the bathroom, complained to my sister that I don’t know what to write. There’s no excuses left and here I sit at the blank page. The three-week break was good but the current article ideas need more contemplation.

Even sewing (not high on my list) feels more attractive than writing right now.

And the calendar says it’s time to begin.

I’m looking for metaphors to describe this feeling.

I’ve landed the Holiday Plane. It was touch and go for a few days. The Christmas decor is back in storage, the fridge is cleaned out, the sheets and towels took a turn through the laundry room. I’ve gotten quite a bit more sleep and even eaten lightly some days. But I’m not sure what to do next.

The New Year Plane hasn’t taken off yet. It’s in a holding pattern. I’m impatient but don’t have the lift to just go. Nebulous plans and goals swirl in the air and there’s not enough mental clarity to move out to the runway and face the right direction. My grandpa used to say, “Time to spare, travel by air.”

New words are beckoning, very different words from the last two years. Act and Serve pushed me out of my comfort zone, demanded energy and at times felt abrasive. I’m not sure about the words I’m thinking of. Too soft and gentle? Too welcoming? Too easy? Or is that what I need now?

Yet I can trust the controllers know what they are doing.

A friend writes that making goals is an act of faith. This idea takes some of the anxiety out of starting a new year. The Pilot directs our steps and uses our goals for His good, no matter what they are.

Another metaphor comes to mind.

Is January the Monday of the year? All the fun of the holidays is over and it’s back to work and schedules and checking things off the list. A little stressful and blah at the same time.

Or January could be the Sunday of the year. Don’t worry about flying right now. Rather think about packing my bag (or even lightening it) and making sure the ticket is in order. Practice thanksgiving and worship. Spend time with others and fellowship. Eat slow, comforting meals and take naps. Refuse to work too hard and instead be still. Sometimes that is the hardest work of all.

Be still.

Maybe that’s all the direction my year needs. Why crave for so much and then hustle to achieve it? After all, it is going to be a year of —! I found my word on my ticket and I think the plane is boarding.